I Am Heaven Sent
by sweet aldebaran
Summary: How much can Sora bear before he breaks?
1. Heaven Sent

I am heaven sent

I am heaven sent

Don't you dare forget.

I am all you ever wanted

What all the other boys all promised

Sorry I told

I just needed you to know

I think in decimals and dollars

I am the cause of all your problems.

--

Sora lay naked, alone, on his lover's bed. He was covered with sweat and that telltale smell. His body was spent, his heart nearly so.

Sex was his way of affirming something. Affirming his bond with Riku. Affirming that he was needed just as he needed. And yet, after his body was pounded into, used, he began to doubt. The aching of his body brought his thoughts back around to the present. He sat up and moaned in tender pain, and went down again. The sheets smelled of Riku. The shower was calling him, and he wanted to wash himself off, but he couldn't muster the willpower. The faint smell of cigarettes drifted into the apartment from out on the balcony. Riku was out in the cool air, wearing nothing more than the bath towel he had wiped himself off with.

Sora called to Riku. It was a needy, mewling cry. Riku didn't give him any heed and when he had finished his cigarette he came in and Sora was lying on the bed completely exposed. Riku sighed and rummaged in the closet for a blanket. He lay down on the couch and wrapped himself up in the blanket, protection from the cold, and fell asleep.

Morning sun woke Sora. Eyes fluttered open and squinted. He shivered. The clock read 6:00; the sun hadn't had time to warm the earth yet. Glancing around, Sora guessed by his absence that Riku had gone to work. The first time Sora had woken up alone he had freaked out, thought Riku had left him, been all depressed. He called Riku and didn't care that he was at work and yelled over the phone, call me, write me a note, something, anything please. Sora had been desperate. Emotionally shocked. Yes, yes Riku said, I'm at work and you can't bother me. The same thing happened again and Sora began to ignore it, turn his eyes away, but it still stung a little every time it happened. It just stung a little less now, familiar but not comfortable. Sora got dressed and wrote a note: I'll be back to make dinner. I love you, Sora. He drew a heart, a little uneven, and left it on the table. He left.

It was 7:30 when Sora finally did make it back to Riku's apartment, groceries in hand. He stood nervously in the doorway and apologized, sorry that he had made Riku wait. Sorry that Riku had expected him and been disappointed.

Riku watched TV while Sora worked in the kitchen. Sora chatted away about his day at work, his unreasonable boss and kind coworkers. About the homeless lady at the bus stop who started up a conversation with him. Riku grunted, his attention split between Sora and the TV, his head aching. Sora set the table and called Riku twice before he got up. Sora continued the one sided conversation but eventually ran out of things to say. Silence ensued, broken only by the quiet noise of the TV that was still occupying Riku's attention. Sora asked if he liked the dinner, and yes, it was good. When he was done eating Riku got up and into the shower. Sora cleared the table and hurried to join Riku. He slid in, hugging Riku from behind, resting his cheek on the broad back. Riku turned and Sora let go, looking up into the eyes, touching the silver wet hair. He welcomed the lips that touched his and there was no resistance to the tongue that slid into his mouth.

The water was steaming hot around them. The heat made Sora lightheaded, and he went almost limp in Riku's arms. He let Riku feel him without resistance, let himself be pushed up against the cool shower wall. The contrast made him shiver. His mind came to life again, and he began to move in Riku's arms. Sora smiled into the wet lips and pulled away, taking Riku's hand and leading him to the bed.

Sora lay there wet and glistening in the streetlight shining in. Riku pushed him back and climbed on top, letting his hands wander over his navel, chest, thighs. Sora pushed up into his hand and Riku lifted his hips higher. He unceremoniously pushed himself in, making Sora moan and shudder in lust. The heat in his stomach curled tighter, making him go faster, the smacking noises and way Sora writhed beneath him only turning him on more. Clouded blue eyes gazed up into his. He could tell he was nearly at his peak and that was the only thing in his mind. He let out a choked cry as he came, riding out the waves of pleasure. He pulled out and walked back to the shower that he hadn't finished.

Sora was left on the bed. He was stunned but still hard and he realized he would have to finish by himself.

He awoke that morning to the sounds of Riku getting ready for work. Sora got up and made coffee, but Riku didn't have time to sit and drink it so he put it in a cup and left for work. Soon after Sora left for the bakery. There was a new kid today who needed to be trained. Sora sighed. He guessed that task would be left up to him. He hoped the kid would be competent at least. Turnover had been high lately and he didn't want to have to deal with someone who would just up and leave in a few months.

The kid's name was Roxas, but he wasn't really a kid. Sora guessed they were about the same age. He was nice and friendly and even cute but Sora felt guilty for even thinking that. They got along well and Roxas was quick to pick everything up. It was the same the next few days and Sora hoped that this kid would stick around longer than the others. At the end of the week Sora was thinking that he could actually be friends with Roxas. Sora invited him out to lunch. They chatted and got along well. Roxas was going to school to become an elementary school teacher. Sora thought that the job would suit him well, with his bright demeanor. He had a girlfriend, Namine, who he had just started dating and liked a lot. Sora was nervous about telling Roxas that he was gay, that he had a boyfriend and not a girlfriend. But Roxas didn't seem to mind at all. After the little confession and immediate acceptance Sora felt even more comfortable with Roxas. He was glad they met.

That night Sora called Riku but he wouldn't pick up. Sora was lonely. He watched his favorite episodes of Friends to fill the void.

The next day Sora called Riku after he was done with work. This time Riku did pick up, and they made plans for dinner and a movie. Sora was exited; much of the time Riku brought his work home with him on his days off do they didn't do couple things together often. At first Sora had been worried that Riku was ashamed of having another boy hold his hand, and not a girl, but then when they did go out Riku had not qualms about kissing in public, and so Sora let it slide. Sora made a reservation at Riku's favorite restaurant. It was on the expensive side, but spending money was worth going out with Riku. However, Riku called the next morning and cancelled. A last minute meeting had been scheduled and Riku couldn't miss it. Sora was disappointed but he knew it wasn't Riku's fault, that work was work and paying the bills came first. Even so, he couldn't help but complain about it to Roxas, who also had a date with his girlfriend. Sora was jealous that Roxas got to spend time with the person he liked and he couldn't.

That night, Sora ended up in a bar drinking the loneliness away.

As it turned out, Riku wouldn't have any free time for the next few months. Sora did his best, going over to Riku's apartment to cook dinner and spend what time with Riku he could. Sometimes, if Riku had already eaten or Sora was late, they ended up fucking and going to sleep. Sora told himself he didn't mind, that it would only last for a little while. Even with Riku sleeping right next to him, though, he couldn't help but feel alone. Sora's going to a bar and getting drunk became a habit. His disheveled appearance, lack of appetite, and somberness were his way of communicating that something was wrong when words didn't have an effect. Riku didn't notice. Roxas did, however. He made it a point to take Sora out sometimes, worried that if he wasn't there Sora would find his way to a bar once again. Roxas brought Sora up out of his emotional rut. The two spent more and more time together as Sora had less and less with Riku.

Sometimes Sora found himself wishing that Riku was more like Roxas, who made it a point to pay attention to his girlfriend's needs. Roxas glowed when he talked about Namine. Sora wondered if Riku ever talked about him with that kind of expression. But then guilt set in, and Sora ignored a truth he had begun to suspect.

Once again Sora and Roxas sat in a coffee shop, talking about nothing in particular. And then, Sora saw Riku across the street. There he is! Right there, with the long silver hair. Sora pointed and Roxas looked with interest at the man who he knew abused Sora emotionally. The man who he thought wouldn't hesitate to abuse Sora's body. The man who Sora would not give up, the man who he loved. Roxas watched as Sora lit up; he glowed, just as Sora said he did when he talked about Namine. Sora's reaction was more interesting that the man standing across the street. Sora waved, trying to catch Riku's attention. He said he had work today, he must have gotten off early…I should call him…no, you can meet him now…I'm sure you'll like him. Sora was babbling.

Suddenly Sora faltered. The next moment the color was gone from his face. His wide eyes were locked.

Roxas followed Sora's line of sight. Riku was there with another man. He bent down and kissed the man sweetly on the lips. Sora began to shake. Riku took hold of the man's hand, and they walked down the street. Roxas reached out to Sora, touching his shoulder, but he wouldn't stop staring. Tears ran down his cheeks. Roxas gently shook him, calling his name. Sora, Sora, don't look. Roxas didn't know what to say, because nothing would make it better. It couldn't get better. Roxas knew this, but he still tried, for Sora's sake. For his own; he couldn't do nothing. Eventually, Roxas grabbed Sora by the wrist and dragged him back to his apartment. By the time they got there Sora had come around and they said goodbye at the door, because Sora just wanted to be alone. A week passed and no one had seen Sora. Riku even called Sora and left a message, come to my place tonight. Always obedient, Sora did as Riku told. He showed up at the apartment at the time he usually would. He walked inside.

Sora had not cried again after Roxas brought him to his apartment. So now, his pent up feelings were let loose in a torrent of screams and tears.

When he was done, he stood there in front of Riku, vision blurry, cheeks red. He was waiting for an answer, an explanation, a reaction. Riku slapped him, hard. Sora stumbled with the impact. Riku caught him and held him close. Sora began to shake again, and he buried his face in Riku's chest, crying. Riku held him, soothed him, kissed his forehead, cheek, nose, lips. He walked Sora back to the bed, still kissing him and undressed him. He pushed one, two fingers inside Sora. Sore stared at the ceiling, quiet and still. Riku made sure he was ready before entering him. He moved slowly and steadily and gently. He held Sora's hand and kissed him. Afterwards, Riku held Sora to his chest and slept.

--

I love you so much.

Do me a favor, baby don't reply,

Cause I can dish it out, but I can't take it.

--

Lyrics by Brand New


	2. Not Your Lover, Not Your Friend

Is it in you now

A second (and unexpected) part to a potentially longer story. The plot just keeps unfolding in my mind, and I don't have enough time to get it all out.

On a different note: These chapters will be short. However, I think I will be able to update more often if they are shorter. It's something I will try to work on.

--

Is it in you now?  
To watch the things you gave your life to broken.

--

About a month ago, Sora had seen his boyfriend kiss another man. And yet there were no traces of this person to be found. Not to say he hadn't searched—he was just shy of hiring a professional to look for this other man when he had been found out. In fact, Sora noticed Riku taking steps, none to covertly, to secure Sora. He told Sora to move in and quit his job for one closer to the apartment. While Sora had done the former, he kept putting off the latter. Even so, it was just a matter of time before Riku would be tired of not having the situation go his way. Soon he would make sure Sora did get a new job.

Late one night, Sora had woken and precariously maneuvered around his sleeping lover. Sora searched through his desk, drawers, the bathroom, everywhere. He sighed in frustration. Frustration at himself and his lack of success, at this unknown person for invading his, at Riku for cheating on him. He was sifting through a stack of papers, his movement becoming violent, when he felt a cold hand on his shoulder.

That cold hand froze him in place. He shut his eyes tightly, protection against Riku's wrath. Seconds that felt like hours ticked past. The hand did not move or slacken its tight grip, and Sora sat just as rigidly. And then the words came, smoothly, calmly, don't you know? You won't find anything.

--

I am not your lover.

I am not your friend.

--

Something in Sora snapped. Those words were the scissors which snipped the last of Sora's nerves. Sora flung Riku's hand away and pushed back. That was the first and last time Sora physically rebelled against Riku. Sora shoved him back, away. He stumbled back a step and then stood, solid, unmoving. Staring Sora down with unprecedented intensity. And then he chuckled, you don't have anywhere else. Tense shoulders relaxed. His posture changed to one of ease. Above all else, the change in his eyes. Sora could see the laughter plainly. It was humiliating.

Sora ran. Out of the apartment, the complex. He didn't care where he went, and so routine took over and he ended up at the bakery where he worked. Sora laughed hysterically. Riku was right; he had nowhere else to go. Running away was stupid. Was he still a kid that ran away from home? Then again, Riku was playing childish games. Sora beat his fist on the wall. In a moment of enlightenment, he realized that Riku was the one at fault. He was wrong. He hurt me, and he didn't even give me an excuse. He didn't say sorry. He's comfortable living a lie.

But aren't I the only one living the lie? I should have seen it before.

Self doubt took over Sora's mind and his body became weak. He couldn't believe that he was living a lie. Of course Riku didn't give an excuse. No one gives an excuse for something they didn't do. And there are answers. I just have to look at them. Otherwise…

Sora decided it would be best if he went somewhere else. The area was dangerous in the dead of night. He could think of only one place to go. Surprisingly, this place wasn't in Riku's arms. He still couldn't bear the thought of seeing Riku in that state. He didn't realize that if he did go back to the apartment, he would only wake Riku up. Fortunately, Sora walked the three miles to Roxas' place.

A platinum blond girl sleepily opened the front door. Sora remembered her from the one time he met her. This was Namine. And she was living with Roxas. Luckily, Sora thought, she remembered him. He didn't know that she only let him in because of his puffy red eyes and shaking hands. Roxas, dear, she called in her half-awaked state. Sora's here. Roxas trudged out of what seemed to be the bedroom and sat next to Namine on the loveseat, next to the overstuffed chair which Sora occupied. He only had to glance at Sora to know something had happened with Riku. He was the only person who had such an effect on Sora. Something deep within his chest moved, a feeling of compassion and companionship. Sora sad in the chair silently, staring at his hands, not knowing what to do now that he was here.

Namine was the first to take direction. Sora, you look so tired, I'll get you the futon and you can get some sleep. She stood and went to drag out the futon from the closet. Through the doorway she could see Roxas give his friend a quick hug. Roxas ruffled Sora's hair. That's why I love him, she thought. She saw the look of understanding that Sora missed. She didn't understand. It bothered her a little bit. Roxas got that sad, lonely look sometimes. She didn't, couldn't know what it meant. Even so, her trust in Roxas by far outweighed that little feeling, and she laid out the futon for Sora and went back to her bedroom and slept.

Sora lived for the next week out of Roxas and Namine's living room. It was the first time since he had moved away from home that he felt like he was part of a family. He realized, though, after overhearing Namine complain to Roxas about him that he wouldn't be welcome much longer. Still, the atmosphere helped his mood. It made him feel stronger and he was able to think about Riku without breaking down.

Namine didn't have any of the reservations that Roxas did toward Sora. Roxas was afraid of hurting him with the truth. Namine knew that it would only get worse without the truth. When she told Sora that he needed to get away from Riku, that he deserved better, she told him directly.

The opinion caused an emotional déjà vu for Sora. Was he right, and Riku wrong?

Either way, Sora decided that he needed to stand on his own feet again. As he expected, Roxas talked to him about Namine's complaint. They were eating lunch at a trendy restaurant when Roxas decided that he needed to bring the uncomfortable subject up. Anticipating it, Sora told Roxas about the apartment he had found. Relief visibly washed over Roxas' face. Sora thought it was because he wouldn't have to deal with Namine anymore, but Roxas was also happy that Sora wouldn't be going back to live with Riku. The more distance between them, the sooner Sora could begin to heal.

With Sora out of her house, Namine was more than happy to let Roxas loan him some money for furniture and other necessities. Although a little unstable and sometimes lonely, Sora seemed happy with the new situation. He had freedom now. He found he had extra time to do what he wanted, where before he was rushing to fix Riku dinner or clean his apartment. While he was sure these times were supposed to make him happy, an empty space surrounded him. A space Riku had once filled. Sora felt like that space needed to be filled once again. He wasn't sure if Riku was the one who he wanted to fill it.

Although Sora was avoiding seeing Riku again, all his worldly possessions were at Riku's place. He was tempted to leave them there and forget about them, but he was not financially able to buy a whole new wardrobe. The dilemma led to a hesitant phone call.

Riku picked up on the second ring and Sora's heart sank to his stomach. He was half hoping that he could leave a message. Sora could barely manage to stutter out his words but Riku kept completely unaffected. He told Sora to stop by anytime, that he kept a key on top of the door frame. The answer caused Sora's stomach to turn. Good, he wouldn't have to see Riku yet. On the other hand, did this mean they weren't together anymore? Had Riku just broken up with him? Or were they merely on a "break"? Sora couldn't bring himself to ask. Instead he thanked Riku and quickly hung up.

The next day he had off from work Sora went to pick up his possessions. Just like Riku said, the key was there. Inside, everything looked just as it had before. Nothing of Sora's was moved. Was Riku waiting for him to come back? Sora wondered that everything stayed clean even though he hadn't been there to take care of things. He wondered if Riku was eating properly. A full fridge told him that Riku was fine. Had he ever needed Sora to take care of him? The contradiction was more than Sora could untangle.

Sora left as soon as possible. Everything fit into a large traveling bag. Walking down the hall to the elevator, head down, he recognized the familiar footsteps before he saw the face framed with silver. Sora began to shake slightly. His step slowed but he didn't look up. When he heard Riku's voice, it seemed distant. So you're actually leaving. Was that voice filled with regret, sorrow, pain? Remorse? Look at me. Riku tilted Sora's chin up gently and stared into his eyes, searching. He was changed somehow. Not physically. The change couldn't be seen. Sora could feel it though, and it made him wonder if moving away from Riku was really what he wanted to do. His thoughts were cut short with a tender kiss and the words, I'll see you again.

Riku's smooth manner infuriated Sora. The more he thought about it, the angrier he got. Riku had played with him. Riku thought that he would come back, tail between his legs. Sora was determined to prove him wrong.

Doing so included what looked like moving on. Sora went on casual dates. He worked, and went out, and did things for himself. Even so, Riku was in the back of his mind. Everything he did was to prove Riku wrong. He could live on his own. He didn't need Riku to drag him down.

Roxas was fooled. He thought that Sora had done a complete three-sixty from the injured person he was before. It was nice to see that he had gotten a life, his own life. That was until Sora met a certain man.

They met through school. It was a new year, and this person was also new. He wasn't a student, however. He was a young professor. Sora was entranced by the man as soon as he laid eyes on him. At first, Sora brushed his infatuation off as just that; a crush. He told himself he was too old to be doing such things, but he couldn't stop himself from daydreaming about this professor. This was in part because Sora felt safe in having a secret, one sided love. He couldn't be touched, and couldn't be hurt. He was content just looking, not drawing attention to himself. At least in the beginning.

As time went on, Sora became discontent. The crush was lasting longer than it should have. Sora was accustomed to being touched and used. He enjoyed the heat that came from a lover's body. Imagining that the man he was with was actually his professor wasn't fulfilling. He needed more.

Of course, Sora turned to Roxas with this problem. He didn't go into detail for Roxas' sake, but he made sure his friend knew what the problem was. The whole idea of Sora falling for another man made him believe that Sora was finally moving on. Roxas had yet to see just why Sora fell so quickly and so hard for the man, why the infatuation had lasted.

What Sora had failed to tell Roxas was his professor's uncanny resemblance, both physically and otherwise, to Riku. It must have been this resemblance that attracted Sephiroth to Sora like a moth to flame.

--

Once again, lyrics by Brand New.


	3. The Road to Recovery

The resemblance between Riku and Sephiroth is not merely physical

I think this will be the last to what has turned out to be a three part story. Another plot has been on my mind, festering. What's interesting is it's connected to this story. If you enjoyed this, please look out for it in the near future!

--

The resemblance between Riku and Sephiroth is not merely physical. While the professor did look like an older version of Sora's old lover, the connection was more than skin deep. The confident, assertive presence was the same. The smooth charm was also the same.

Sora was attracted to Sephiroth for all these reasons. Most importantly, he was a perfect fit for the place where Riku was torn from Sora's heart.

Naturally, Sora couldn't hide his crush on his professor for long. The way he unceasingly talked about the man let everyone around him know. When teased, he blushed like a schoolgirl. He didn't hook up with other man anymore. The rush of nameless men after Riku had slowed to a trickle and then stopped altogether. Sora had it in his head that he didn't need anyone else. He was fine just looking at Sephiroth. It was all he needed. That was his safety. It was why Sephiroth was different from Riku, and how Sora justified his obsession.

In many respects Sephiroth was peculiar as a professor. He wouldn't allow anyone else to teach his class or take part in any way. He said they all slowed him down, were disorganized, and left things in a state of chaos. Sephiroth's need for perfection was a chaos all in its own.

So, when Sora saw his beloved professor standing uncomfortably in the bakery, he nearly passed out. Roxas was working the same shift and witnessed Sora swoon. The next moment Sora was greeting his professor who immediately recognized him as the boy who was in love with him. Other professors often laughed about it behind his back despite the fear of a stern reprimand by Sephiroth himself. Still, it was nice to see a familiar face in such a bright, sweet smelling place.

As it turned out, Sephiroth needed some pastries for his mother. The reason contrasted so greatly with demeanor that Sora almost laughed out loud. Without missing a beat, Sephiroth raised one eyebrow and proceeded to order a box of sweets.

Although the interaction was brief, Sora couldn't help but think about it all the time. He now knew that out of all the other students, Sephiroth would recognize him. Sora was determined to continue to get closer to his professor. It was as if a new door had been opened; one that Sora wouldn't let close.

The next day Sora had class, he made it a point to smile at Sephiroth as he walked into class. To his disappointment, there was no reaction. This was frustrating for the boy, but only made him more determined. He couldn't focus on any of the information he was supposed to be taking notes on. All he could do was stare intently at the beautiful form and listen to the beautiful voice, even if he wasn't hearing the words.

As Sora walked out of class, that same silky voice called him back in. His heart dropped to his stomach and began to race. Yes? came the unsteady reply. your last test score only confirmed my fears about you class habits. Your notes are always insufficient. While you seem like you're paying attention, the information never sticks. If you don't bring your grade up quickly, you may fail my class. This, of course, was not what Sora wanted to hear. He was wishing for something along the lines of, would you like to join me for lunch? And then an ingenious plan came to Sora. A smile slowly crept onto his face as the words came out. I'm trying very hard, but I don't think I get the material. If I could get some help, I'm sure I could raise my grade… Sora trailed off. Would it work? Now that it was out, it didn't seem like such a good idea.

Sephiroth sat in his desk chair, contemplating. He looked up at Sora, a ghost of a smile on his lips. Do you think tutoring would help?

Once again, Sora almost fainted. A blush rose on his cheeks. He agreed happily. His beloved professor proceeded to take his calendar from a desk and set up a date with Sora. Only it was a study session, not a date.

That evening at work, Sora could not stop babbling about his date with Sephiroth. Roxas, always the reasonable one, pointed out things that Sora was hoping to avoid. That he resembles Riku was on the top of that list. But Sora tried to convince Roxas that Sephiroth was different. Even if that was the original reason for attraction, he realized they were different people. And Sora felt good about that.

Even so, the study session didn't come soon enough. Sora was by nature impatient, and that only drew out his agony. When the day came, he called Roxas over to his apartment for moral support. In other words, to pick out something to wear. Roxas thought Sora was completely over thinking the whole thing. He told Sora that Sephiroth wouldn't think of one of his students in that way. These words did nothing to dampen Sora's spirits.

Sora had agreed to meet his professor in a secluded book store. It was a dim place, lit only by lamps. Book shelves rose to the ceiling. The place smelled of old books and paper. In a back corner, Sephiroth sat reading. Sora made his way over slowly, suddenly nervous about being alone with the person he admired and idolized. When Sephiroth became aware of his presence, he glanced up. The eye contact made a shiver run up Sora's spine.

The usually bubbly, happy Sora was unusually quiet and focused during the entire hour, if not focused on what he should have been. Sephiroth was unsurprisingly distracting. He was hyper sensitive about the close proximity of his professor. He imagined he could feel Sephiroth's warmth. The thought made him blush, and he quickly refocused his attention on the lesson at hand.

It was all over too quickly. In that rare instance of studying, the feeling of regret that washed over Sora when the lesson was over was even more peculiar but for the presence of his professor. Besides that, Sora had actually learned something, and he was happy for it. Exited that maybe, Sephiroth would be happy that he was working to bring his grade up. Sora decided that he could show his professor he cared by working harder.

Out of the dim book store, Sora blinked in the sunlight. He walked to a café near his apartment, ordered a cappuccino and a scone and mused over the previous hour in glee. He went over everything in his mind—the way Sephiroth's velvety voice purred, the way he smelled, the way he would trail his finger over the book as he read. Admittedly, it had been difficult for Sora to stay focused. He was not going to do anything to mess up this opportunity to be close to his professor.

The next week, same place and time. Sora was already floating in the clouds when he got to the book store. He saw a flash of silver hair, and his step quickened. It seemed he got there at the same time his professor did. Sora rounded the bookshelf, expecting to see Sephiroth. Instead, he saw the silver-haired man from his past. He stopped dead in his tracks, heart in his stomach. Riku was standing there with his arm around the man Sora had seen him with before, all those months ago. A turmoil of emotion rose up within him.

Riku looked up, and his face showed surprise much like Sora's had. It soon calmed, smoothed over, and Riku gave a friendly wave and smile. The man he was with looked at Sora and then at Riku questioningly. Sora felt like he was watching from afar when Riku walked up to him and introduced his boyfriend. Like there had never been anything between them. Riku told the man that Sora was an old friend… what a lie. And so blatant. Immediately Sora felt sorry for this man, who had fallen into Riku's trap. He wondered if they had shared similar experiences. But then, Riku's expression was tender when he looked at his boyfriend, like he never had with Sora.

I handled myself well, thought Sora as he walked to the usual corner where Sephiroth was waiting. I was friendly, and polite. I didn't cry… I won't cry. I'm over him completely.

He thought this, even if it wasn't entirely true. His hands were shaking slightly as he greeted Sephiroth and sat down. After the first five minutes of the lesson, Sephiroth stopped mid sentence. You aren't even listening to me, are you? Teary-eyed, Sora looked up at him and apologized, giving a vague excuse. In a rare moment of feeling, Sephiroth's face softened. He put his hand on Sora's head, almost petting him for a moment. Does it have to do with that man you were talking to earlier? Sephiroth asked quietly. For all the comfort he was attempting to provide for Sora, his feelings were shrouded behind his composed features. Sora nodded. Well? Sephiroth gently prompted. It was all Sora needed to spill his heart out, in fragments, to his professor.

In the end, Sephiroth didn't really understand what Sora had gone through, or what had caused this emotional overflow. But he knew Sora needed him there. He found himself wanting to support the boy through this trauma, even if it would be wise to avoid getting involved. But his usual self-control slipped, and he stayed there for Sora with fond feelings in his heart.

Maybe Sora unconsciously sensed that. Maybe he could feel a real connection with his beloved professor. Just maybe, those feelings would help him on his way to recovery.

--

Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed it! Please review it keeps me going when the words don't seem to want to be written.


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